Arse on me hip!! #baglife!!

Late again!

Hi guys,

I’m so so sorry I’m late with this post again!! (typical me) that’s just me all over late for everything. I’d be late for me own funeral!! In my defence I’ve been pretty ill the last few days, I’ve been so tired I can barely keep my head up hence why it’s taking me so long to write this

Operation update!

My last post was Thursday last week I wrote that post while waiting to go in for my minor surgery. So just to update you all went really well, the recovery was great and quite painless.

I had the operation like I said and heeled quickly, my Crohns was somewhat under control (had been for a couple weeks) I managed to take my little one swimming and kidz planet!! she had a blast so did I. I had been managing to eat and put on half a stone 😁 everything was going so well!! Then my dreaded period came 😩

Time of the month!

My periods have been terrible for some time, with me having periods every 2weeks lasting for up to 10 days causing my Crohns to flare EVERYTIME!!

The pain is unreal its like everything swells inside causing massive inflammation, you can actually feel the heat radiating from my back and stomach, so I’m now laid up with a hot water bottle.

I’ve got so much I should and could be doing right now but I’m in way to much pain to move! Its so freaking annoying.

My brains completely motivated willing me to do things, while my body tells me point blank to go fuck myself!!

I’m now not able to eat as my Crohns is now back in full force. I just hope it eases off once my period has finished. Any other Crohns sufferers find there periods are just awful???

Keeping it in the family! 👪

So as your all aware I suffer with chronic Crohns and perianal disease. I’ve been suffering with symptoms since I was 14 years old.

I didn’t realise it was crohns that I had. I’d seen how my dad and my auntie had suffered from crohns for years!! And at the time I was no wear near in their league. I just got belly aches and went to the toilet a lot (I thought everyone was like me)

I remember saying to my friends cause at the time all the girls wore skin tight jeans 👖 how do you girls wear them all day? My stomach kills me if I wear anything too tight. I also thought I was lazy cause I never seemed to have the same amount of energy as everyone else.

Still I never thought I had crohns! after seeing how my family suffered from it, I thought if it was crohns I would have been a lot worse. As I got older my symptoms got more severe.

I kept going back to my GP to express my concerns, my stomach was so swollen and id put on a lot of weight, I kept explaining that my dad and auntie have crohns and that I’m sure I have it. Time and time I was turnt away to be told it’s not genetic and it doesn’t run in the family. Evidence today does point to crohns being hereditary and that would make sense.

My dad and auntie both have crohns, my cousin has Ulcerative colitis and I have family in Ireland that also suffers with crohns.

Well this resulted in me being untreated for a long time. My stomach completely shut down. Sickness, diarrhoea and extreme pain all the weight I had put on started to come off. I had ballooned to a whooping 14 and a half stone!!! And I’m only 4ft 11

I remember being at work, I worked at the local Guardian newspapers in the advertising department at the time and id be on the phone to a customer and I would have to terminate the call so I could curl up in a ball under my desk the pain was so bad. This carried on for some time getting increasingly worse.

I worked out on the field driving as well and on many occasions I messed myself my health was getting increasingly worse and I could no longer hide it and carry on. So one morning I ran into my mum and dads room, rolling around on there bed screaming in agony. They rushed me into hospital.

Who knew id be leaving with my arse on my hip (Colostomy bag)

I endured the biggest and worst flare up of my entire life (I’ve never felt pain like it) my entire large intestine had completely ruptured and was completely destroyed.

They preformed what they call a Sub-total colectomy. They removed my large bowel left my rectum in (which was still diseased with crohns) so that some day I would be able to have the bag reversed.

Before they preformed the surgery I had been begging to have a bag anything was better then being in the pain I was in, I wasn’t worried about having a bag I just wanted my Quilty of life back.

For some reason I pictured the bag to look like a Tesco’s carrier bag 🤣🤣

So I had the emergency operation, had a bag and mentally I was fine with it (I was still with my first boyfriend, the one I made wear two condoms lol)

When I first see the bag I cried but I soon got over it. Then the surgeon mentioned that I will know when the bag starts to work because it will start making noises!!

Start making noises I said?? He said yeah you know like passing wind but only in your bag 😳

Fart noises! 😳

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I said am I going to no when this will happen? Will I know when I’m about to fart? His reply well no!! you don’t have any nerve endings there😩 So I’ll be just as surprised as everyone else when it goes off 🙈

All that came to my mind was, I’m going to be at work with a client and my bags going to go off and everyone will think I’m there just casually farting (that thought made me want to die lol) I worked on the motors department and most of my customers were male, I was only 18years old at the time.

I thought that’s it I’m never going back to work again and I loved my job still til this day it was one of the best jobs I’ve ever had great work place and amazing people I miss it!!

Baring in mind I had all these thoughts 💭 and my bag hadn’t even started working at this point.

As my bag was yet to start working the surgeon arranged to come back and see me to check everything was ok he also asked if it was ok to bring in students. I said it was fine, up uptil that point i had handled everything pretty well right up until the surgeon enlighten me that my bag would soon make farting noises! I then was struggling.

Well in comes the surgeon with the students and he was explaining to them what I’d had done and as he lifted my top to show them his masterpiece!! my bag made this loud horrendous farting sound I was mortified 🙈

All sorts of things running round my head how am I going to be able to work if it does this etc etc..😭

Round of applause 👏

Well the surgeon was overjoyed by the noise and he told everyone to give me and my bag a round of applause 👏

A round of a fucking applause can you believe it!!

Well I completely lost my shit and told everyone including the surgeon to fuck off I don’t know what possessed me 🙈 the surgeon apologized he said because I was handling things so well he didn’t think I would have got upset.

I look back now and I can laugh about it lol 😆 I’ll tell you guys some more of my stories next week!! I hope I haven’t bored you all! I just wanted to share part of my story and experiences with having a colostomy bag.

I haven’t got any pics of me with a colostomy bag it wasn’t really the done thing back then and I didn’t know anyone else that had one. ( if I did have a pic I would definitely postit ) that bag saved my life and I wouldn’t be here today without it.

For all those who currently have a bag I salute you! You are all beautiful.

Until the next time.

My blessed and not so blessed life!!